Episode Sixty Three: (Un)Justifiable Cruelty

Like many people of Russian descent, I suffer from the occasional temper.  Today I had a brush with my own dark side.  At work I lost my temper on a biller who had been making mistakes in her billing files.  After I calmed down, I wrote an email apologizing, and then I spoke to the liaison for the biller’s company.  I felt better after speaking to the liaison, who agreed with my concern, but as I hung up the phone I realized just how easy it is to transform into a monster.

The monstrous thing is not that I lost my temper.  While losing my temper is hardly a good thing, the real frightening thing is how we as a society justify being rude, mean, or downright cruel to others.  Yelling at the biller accomplished nothing, and it certainly made her job all the more stressful.  The liaison helped remedy the situation, but in the end left me with a small feeling of vindication.  The problem is, it’s irrelevant whether we’re correct or incorrect; being “right” does not give us Carte Blanche to hurt other peoples’ feelings.

We live in a winning-obsessed culture.  Not only do we love being right and hate being wrong, but we believe that if we are factually correct that means we are in the right.  The internet has always been the playground where our argumentative nature comes out to play.  Facebook, in particular, has dragged out the worst in many of us.  I use Facebook as the example because unlike debating politics on a forum where your opponent is a stranger, on Facebook people debate politics with their friends, family, coworkers, and classmates. 

We get so caught up in proving our message that we forget the subtext and the impact on our relationship with others.  Unfortunately an argument may prove a point while being demeaning to others.  You may “win” an argument while successfully belittling someone you otherwise love and care about.  In this phenomenon our opinions become more important to us than people.  It’s not to say that our ideology lacks merit, or isn’t standing for the right thing, but our presentation of our ideology is harmful and disrespectful to others.

Differences of ideology are nothing new, but when we are not standing face to face with the people we break down with debate we forget their humanity.  We cannot always prevent others from taking offense.  Even words without an intent to harm can still be hurtful, but we must have the wisdom to recognize when we are in the wrong even if our facts or our ideology is correct.  Tone matters, as does the method by which we deliver our message.  We must have the courage to admit when we are in the wrong.  When we feel vindicated at hurting the feelings of someone around us because we were “right” then we become monsters.  We like to believe that evil is found in large actions, but frequently it is the small ways in which we try to justify cruelty that we create evil in the world. 

Episode Sixty Two: The Feministic Implications of Frozen

In many ways Frozen was to the new generation what The Little Mermaid was to my generation.  Frozen has beautiful Disney music, singing, obsessed fans, and enough merchandising to put all the accountants at Disney into a blissful slumber for 100 years.  I have heard quite a bit of back and forth from those who consider Frozen to be a win for feminism and those who consider it to be a step back.  One particular article stood out to me, the critique by actress and neuroscientist, Mayim Bialik.  Dr. Bialik raised many good points, but I feel there’s one aspect she didn’t consider.  Raising a counterpoint to Dr. Bialik feels a little presumptuous on my part; it’s as though I’m a chimp trying to refute someone’s doctoral thesis.  However, regardless of the content of the film itself, it is the reception of Frozen in young audiences that proved a win for feminism. 

The film presented us two royal sisters, Anna and Elsa.  While both sisters are important to the plot and have ample screen time, there was a clear favorite among fans young and old.  Elsa stole the show.  Anna was clearly intended to be the main protagonist.  However, if costumes, merchandising, and fan-frenzy have taught us anything, it’s that everyone loves Elsa.

                

What’s the difference between the two sisters?  Both were born princesses.  Both were beautiful.  All the general prerequisites of Disney Princesses were met.  The difference? The younger sister got a boyfriend at the end of the movie.  The older sister got a Kingdom, bitchin’ magic powers, and a friggin’ ice castle (ok, and the best song in the movie).  The reception of Frozen proved that for little girls everywhere, a handsome male companion was nothing compared to having magical (and political) power. An entire generation of young girls have clearly shown that girls want bitchin’ magic powers, not just some guy with a nice sleigh (sorry Kristoff). 

                

Women with magical powers are not new to Disney, but that role has been limited to villains, matriarchs, and brief plot devices.  Stop and review women with innate magic in prior Disney films.  There’s the villains: Maleficent, Ursula, and the Evil Queen.  Then there’s the matriarchs: the Fairy Godmother, Flora/Fauna/Merryweather, and the witch lady from Brave.  Outside of that, magic associated with Disney Princesses was in the form of a plot device rather than a skill (i.e. Magic Hair, Enchantresses fed up with snotty princes on Airbnb, Blue Fairies, Faustian pacts, etc.). 

When Frozen introduced Elsa, it introduced a young Disney woman with serious magical ability fashioned through her own willpower and creativity.  Elsa doesn’t simply perspire chilly air or serendipitously cry healing tears; she can construct elaborate and beautiful structures with her ability.  She transforms not from Princess to Queen, but from a woman whose innate talent acted upon her into a woman who wields her power with proficiency and grace.  She is no longer the victim of her circumstances or her environment, but rather the master of her own fate.  This concept differentiates Elsa and many of the contemporary Disney women from their predecessors.

While a work should be judged on its content, and not its reception, I feel the reception of Frozen proved insightful into the future of feminism.  Fiction is transformative in nature, but sometimes that transformation is not the one intended by the creator.  The absolute love affair with Elsa reflects our enthusiasm as a society with women coming into strength and power.  A generation of girls are wanting more than a rescue courtesy of a romantic partner.  A generation of girls are looking up to a, albeit fictional, woman in power.  One day the little girls running around in Elsa costumes at Halloween will be old enough to read about the real women in positions of power who have shaped history.  And, if we nurture these girls, they will grow up and change the world.