Episode Sixty Three: (Un)Justifiable Cruelty

Like many people of Russian descent, I suffer from the occasional temper.  Today I had a brush with my own dark side.  At work I lost my temper on a biller who had been making mistakes in her billing files.  After I calmed down, I wrote an email apologizing, and then I spoke to the liaison for the biller’s company.  I felt better after speaking to the liaison, who agreed with my concern, but as I hung up the phone I realized just how easy it is to transform into a monster.

The monstrous thing is not that I lost my temper.  While losing my temper is hardly a good thing, the real frightening thing is how we as a society justify being rude, mean, or downright cruel to others.  Yelling at the biller accomplished nothing, and it certainly made her job all the more stressful.  The liaison helped remedy the situation, but in the end left me with a small feeling of vindication.  The problem is, it’s irrelevant whether we’re correct or incorrect; being “right” does not give us Carte Blanche to hurt other peoples’ feelings.

We live in a winning-obsessed culture.  Not only do we love being right and hate being wrong, but we believe that if we are factually correct that means we are in the right.  The internet has always been the playground where our argumentative nature comes out to play.  Facebook, in particular, has dragged out the worst in many of us.  I use Facebook as the example because unlike debating politics on a forum where your opponent is a stranger, on Facebook people debate politics with their friends, family, coworkers, and classmates. 

We get so caught up in proving our message that we forget the subtext and the impact on our relationship with others.  Unfortunately an argument may prove a point while being demeaning to others.  You may “win” an argument while successfully belittling someone you otherwise love and care about.  In this phenomenon our opinions become more important to us than people.  It’s not to say that our ideology lacks merit, or isn’t standing for the right thing, but our presentation of our ideology is harmful and disrespectful to others.

Differences of ideology are nothing new, but when we are not standing face to face with the people we break down with debate we forget their humanity.  We cannot always prevent others from taking offense.  Even words without an intent to harm can still be hurtful, but we must have the wisdom to recognize when we are in the wrong even if our facts or our ideology is correct.  Tone matters, as does the method by which we deliver our message.  We must have the courage to admit when we are in the wrong.  When we feel vindicated at hurting the feelings of someone around us because we were “right” then we become monsters.  We like to believe that evil is found in large actions, but frequently it is the small ways in which we try to justify cruelty that we create evil in the world. 

Episode Sixty Two: The Feministic Implications of Frozen

In many ways Frozen was to the new generation what The Little Mermaid was to my generation.  Frozen has beautiful Disney music, singing, obsessed fans, and enough merchandising to put all the accountants at Disney into a blissful slumber for 100 years.  I have heard quite a bit of back and forth from those who consider Frozen to be a win for feminism and those who consider it to be a step back.  One particular article stood out to me, the critique by actress and neuroscientist, Mayim Bialik.  Dr. Bialik raised many good points, but I feel there’s one aspect she didn’t consider.  Raising a counterpoint to Dr. Bialik feels a little presumptuous on my part; it’s as though I’m a chimp trying to refute someone’s doctoral thesis.  However, regardless of the content of the film itself, it is the reception of Frozen in young audiences that proved a win for feminism. 

The film presented us two royal sisters, Anna and Elsa.  While both sisters are important to the plot and have ample screen time, there was a clear favorite among fans young and old.  Elsa stole the show.  Anna was clearly intended to be the main protagonist.  However, if costumes, merchandising, and fan-frenzy have taught us anything, it’s that everyone loves Elsa.

                

What’s the difference between the two sisters?  Both were born princesses.  Both were beautiful.  All the general prerequisites of Disney Princesses were met.  The difference? The younger sister got a boyfriend at the end of the movie.  The older sister got a Kingdom, bitchin’ magic powers, and a friggin’ ice castle (ok, and the best song in the movie).  The reception of Frozen proved that for little girls everywhere, a handsome male companion was nothing compared to having magical (and political) power. An entire generation of young girls have clearly shown that girls want bitchin’ magic powers, not just some guy with a nice sleigh (sorry Kristoff). 

                

Women with magical powers are not new to Disney, but that role has been limited to villains, matriarchs, and brief plot devices.  Stop and review women with innate magic in prior Disney films.  There’s the villains: Maleficent, Ursula, and the Evil Queen.  Then there’s the matriarchs: the Fairy Godmother, Flora/Fauna/Merryweather, and the witch lady from Brave.  Outside of that, magic associated with Disney Princesses was in the form of a plot device rather than a skill (i.e. Magic Hair, Enchantresses fed up with snotty princes on Airbnb, Blue Fairies, Faustian pacts, etc.). 

When Frozen introduced Elsa, it introduced a young Disney woman with serious magical ability fashioned through her own willpower and creativity.  Elsa doesn’t simply perspire chilly air or serendipitously cry healing tears; she can construct elaborate and beautiful structures with her ability.  She transforms not from Princess to Queen, but from a woman whose innate talent acted upon her into a woman who wields her power with proficiency and grace.  She is no longer the victim of her circumstances or her environment, but rather the master of her own fate.  This concept differentiates Elsa and many of the contemporary Disney women from their predecessors.

While a work should be judged on its content, and not its reception, I feel the reception of Frozen proved insightful into the future of feminism.  Fiction is transformative in nature, but sometimes that transformation is not the one intended by the creator.  The absolute love affair with Elsa reflects our enthusiasm as a society with women coming into strength and power.  A generation of girls are wanting more than a rescue courtesy of a romantic partner.  A generation of girls are looking up to a, albeit fictional, woman in power.  One day the little girls running around in Elsa costumes at Halloween will be old enough to read about the real women in positions of power who have shaped history.  And, if we nurture these girls, they will grow up and change the world. 

Episode Sixty One: An Unusual Metaphor that Explains the Rift Between Atheists and Christians

So once again the old wounds between the "logical" atheists and the "spiritual" Christians were ripped open by the break through discoveries with the long sought-after "God Particle".  I've never understood how evidence supporting the theories of evolution and the big bang disproves the existence of god- (though it does interfere with a literal interpretation of biblical timeline).  As a Christian and someone who does take quite a shine to logic I've never seen why we must consider science and Christianity mutually exclusive. 

I like to think of it as lego blocks and the kid playing with the lego blocks.  Some factions of atheists believe that the existence of the building blocks of the universe disproves the existence of God--- sort of like saying because there are lego blocks building a lego house therefore there is not a child who constructed the house.  Some factions of Christianity seem to take the same argument, in a different direction- they try hard to disprove things such as evolution for the same reason.  Because there is a kid playing with toys- and the kid made the house.  The house of legos was generated solely from the mind of the child- and no blocks were used in the process. 

I'm not saying Christians and Atheists are wrong- but rather, there seems to be a fallacy in the philosophy of the extremists.  They say God made man in his image- and it is a known fact human kind was able to differentiate from other animals because of our use of tools.  Therefore, it is not unreasonable that God fashioned the universe itself in an elegant way- in a way that provided a framework and foundation to work from.  God made tools to aid him in the creation of the universe.  You can build a toy house out of many materials- but nothing works quite as easy or brings as much joy as snapping together a couple of legos.

Episode Sixty: Harry Potter- Kind of Like Batman meets Jane Eyre

So I was treated to a midnight showing of the Harry Potter Deathly Hallows part two.  After I graduated last summer I finally had time to sit down and read the series.  While the six hour wait wasn't particularly fun, there were some definite perks going on opening night in the US.  For example, a girl dressed up as Bellatrix offering people cupcakes shaped like cauldrons- too adorable.  It was fun hearing everyone laugh and cry at all the same scenes.  Yet, a few months ago I found myself realizing another British orphan who pre-dates Harry, and a few weeks ago my fiance and I realized the famous near-sighted wizard has a lot in common with another fictional icon- Batman.

Batman, Jane Eyre, and Harry Potter, perhaps three of the world's best fictitious orphans.  Now some may argue- why am I roping Jane into the  mix.  I happened to be re-reading the first chapters of Jane Eyre when I realized how much Jane's experience living with the Reeds set the stage for Harry's life with the Dursleys.  Jane and Harry both live in the heart of misery.  They both lost their parents as infants and live with an insufferable Aunt who hates them for just being them.  They're both considered odd by their overly conventional relatives, and both have a male cousin that bullies them.  They're second class citizens and then early in their story they're shipped off to boarding school.  The similarities generally end there- Hogwarts is made of awesome and Lowood, well, you'd be better off in most prisons than Lowood.

However the real parallel comes down to Harry and Batman.  Their stories continually pull back to the same hook- their parents were murdered and they want justice for their parents.  Both have inherited a pretty sum of money- you take your pick whether you prefer a vault of gold at Grignotts or stock in Wayne Enterprises.  And let's face it, the more you think of the parallels to Harry and Bruce Wayne, the more it all sort of clicks.  Ron, unfortunately for him, is a lot like Robin.  There's also the wise mentor in Alfred the Butler and Dumbledore. 

The reason I say Harry is like Jane Eyre meets Batman is because, Harry has all of Batman's angst but ultimately finds his peace.  Now I'm sure a comic book aficionado would have some case to argue that Batman eventually finds happiness- but generally Bruce Wayne is the ultimate loner.  Sure, he has girlfriends (briefly), various young boys as Robin (does he recruit from a van with candy?), and of course, his Butler/Confidante.  None the less, the theme of Harry Potter is that Harry ultimately finds his strength from those around him.  It always comes back to Harry and his friends Ron and Hermione, to his relationships with his mentors (Sirius, Albus, Remus, Hagrid), and he does have his peace despite being hunted by a sociopath-wizard for 17ish years.  In that respect Harry pulls a Jane Eyre.  Jane Eyre has had a horrible life full of loneliness and adversity- but in the end she has a family, friends, and a husband who is her mental equal. 

Episode Fifty Nine: The Business to Get In?

The other day I ran into a woman at work who was ranting because Blockbuster did not have "Meet Me in Saint Louis" (And no, I don't work at Blockbuster or any other video rental place).  Then she asked me what place in the area would have that video available to rent that night.  I told her most of the video stores went under, and I was relatively new to town- so I did not know of a place.  I said she could check Redbox, but mostly Redbox carries new releases, but she could look on Netflix to see if it was on instant queue.  She continued to ask me again if there were any stores in the area and launched onto a rant about video stores. She ended the rant with "Video Rental, that's the business to get in"- and she didn't mean that angrily or facetiously, she was serious.

I realize it's frustrating when you can't find something you're looking for.  However, I believe this instance, while really more of my average Monday at work, explains multiple problems I have with our current culture.


1. We are obsessed with Self-Gratification: if we cannot get what we want when we want it, we feel wronged instead of recognizing the situation for what it is- a moderate inconvenience.

2. We think that if we keep asking the same person the same question that "I don't know" will eventually turn into a magical answer that solves our problems

3. We hate change and will tout the superiority of a more costly and poorly organized institution because we aren't ready to try something new. 

4. We have delusions that if something falls into our personal whimsy that it must surely be profitable.

And number 4 takes us home.  It goes without saying why you can't find video rental stores anymore.  Instant streaming is genius, it takes out the cost of a traditional store (staff, building leases, insurance for the store, tangible inventory) and puts in a convenient system to watch movies and television from home.  There is a reason movie rental places went out of business.  However, I suppose if you want to take your life savings and use them to fund such an ill conceived business venture, go for it- it is your money. Myself, I think I'll keep an open mind and peruse the selections on Netflix instant queue, my fiance and I have found some unexpected new favorites that way. 

Episode Fifty Eight: Christianity, I'm taking it Back.

(*Taking it back is an expression used to sometimes describe the act of reclaiming a fashion, or, for the purpose of this post, a religion)

As an active Christian I hate to admit it, but more often than not, I am embarrassed by how Christians are represented to the rest of world.  It's not just that certain people waving the banner of Christianity are depicting Christians as anti-science, irrational, and anti-progress, but more importantly that our faith is being represented as hateful and judgmental.  The problem is worse than that- the modern Christian is so consumed by politics and hot button issues that the questions of day to day living are ignored.  This is not to say that Christian shouldn't be debating the major issues- but we are forgetting to address the challenges in our daily lives. 

As someone under the age of thirty I'm distressed at the low church attendance by people in my age group.  While one could argue my generation is going to hell, I prefer to question how my generation perceives Christianity.  I've made it a point to have friends of various faiths.  I've had some Christian friends argue that this is a massive faux-pas.  However, Jesus didn't spend the majority of his time with rabbis- he befriended tax collectors and prostitutes.  This is not an excuse for any misguided Christians to start preaching at the local strip club.  Sorry.  The point is, after talking to non-Christians the majority of complaints have nothing to do with a dislike of Jesus or the core virtues of Christianity. More often than not, non-Christians dislike hypocrisy and intolerance displayed by certain Christians.

Let's face it, the crusades, the Salem witch trials, the Spanish inquisition- we do have a lot of less-than-admirable moments in our history as a major branch of religion.  We're not taking the beam out of our eye before mentioning the speck in our brother's eye, as the bible tells us to do.  Christ, it is often said, is love.  Why then are so many Christians insisting on being champions of hate?  We've forgotten how important the virtues of forgiveness and charity are. 

The problem, however, is not Christianity.  "Do onto others as you would have done onto you" is hardly the philosophy of intolerance.  There are also plenty of Christians out there in the world who still love, and who are progressive and intelligent.  There are plenty of Christians out there who are friends with agnostics, pagans, Buddhists, Muslims, and yes, even atheists.  Our task is to take back Christianity as the religion of love and forgiveness.  We must begin to live our lives by example.  Let's drive a little friendlier on the road Christians.  Let your charity not be limited to people of the same denomination or church.  Non-Christians learn about the love of Christ through our actions. 

As the title of this post implies, it's time to take back Christianity.  Let's reclaim it and make it our own again. 

Episode Fifty Seven: The One thing I truly Loathe.

Now I try to keep the Curve Zone clean of hatred and ill will.  I don't want this to be some shrine of ranting or complaining.  It's easy to blog angry- too easy.  Blogging angry seldom achieves anything.  However, I'm tired and won't be posting anything relevant for at least 12 hours.  So it's time for me to admit a long-standing hatred I have.   There is only one thing in the universe I truly hate.

Blood suckers.

Alright, and before I get ripped limb by limb by Twihards, I'm not talking about your disco-ball teen-romances.  Vampires have, if nothing else, given us an amusing array of fiction as well as spread hilariously awful paranoia regarding the red cross.

I'm talking about Mosquitoes, those little, parasitic sons of [censored].  It's actually been a better summer for me this year, but I am always the person they bite the most and my skin breaks out worse than most people.  However, I know they're out there, and like a gritty old hero of a western movie I sit in vigilance for the day I can end their menace to my world. 

Mosquitoes think they can just fly into our country and take our blood and not pay taxes.  I say no more.  Armed with my narrow minded intolerance and my fly swatter I'll be waiting this summer Mosquitoes.